Gratitude - for my big girl

It had really been a long day. A day full of laundry and dishes. Full of making meals and cleaning them up. Running errands. Running in the yard. Dressing up, and of course, dancing. Normal stuff, but a long day.

I had one more errand to fit in, and not enough time to do it, so I planned a trip, sans children, for after I put Keelyn to bed. I figured I'd just run out, get it done, and be home in time to kiss Hailey goodnight and relax.

Most efficient use of my time. Gotta fit it all in. Can't slow down.

So Keelyn's asleep, I'm on my way out the door, and I hear, "Mommy, where are you goin'?"

"Out for a quick trip to the store, Hailey...I'll be right back."

She looks at me with her big, blue wanting eyes. "Can I come?"

"Um, well Hailey..." As much as I'd yearned for that speedy last run to check off my to-do list, something in me came out saying, "Sure, you can come, I'd like the company."

And we were off. We sang the whole way to the store. Hailey's favorite song right now is "Jesus Loves the Little Children" off a CD a friend gave us. Hearing her sing that song has to be one of the sweetest sounds I've ever heard. Our short car trip alone was enough to make me realize how much we both needed a few moments together at the end of the day.

It seems we're careful to work in special one-on-one time with Daddy and the kids because he seldom sees them, but it's easy to forget that, though I see them 12 hours a day, much of my time with them (even when I am with the other one during Daddy's one-on-one) is not quality time. It's getting through the day. It's juggling two at once.

We walked in the store, hand in hand, one on one, and we shopped. Now she's shopped with me before...giving an opinion here and there, finding sparkly things we must buy, because we must have them because, ooh, Mommy, this is beautiful and sparkly with diamonds!! She's got an eye for things that shine. But this trip was different. Maybe because it had been a while since the two of us had gone anywhere together, without the company of a baby who is way more interesting than I am, and therefore gets all the attention Hailey has to give. And maybe because when it's the three of us, the general goal is to get in and out of a store as quickly as possible, while breaking as few things as possible, stealing as few things as possible, and dropping as few goldfish as possible. Seriously. They dive like Nemo on the hunt for his father.

Regardless of the reason, it was different. It was just us. No one else in the store mattered. No time line mattered. No direction mattered. We shopped, we did what we had come to do, and we did what she wanted to do.

And we sang the whole way home.

As I tucked her into bed, I couldn't help but feel all warm and fuzzy about the hour of bonding we'd had. In so many ways she's becoming a big little girl. A friend. Someone I know everything about, but about whom I have everything to learn. Someone to talk to. About Mickey, and Minnie, and Sleeping Beauty, anyway. And that was just what I needed.